不要对患有焦虑障碍症的人说这四句话上

司马如花 · 发表于 2015-11-13 17:20:25

本帖最后由司马如花于 2015-11-13 17:23 编辑

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2015-11-13 17:17 上传

These statements can do more harm than good.
这些句子带来的坏处比好处多

Posted Oct 01, 2015

有焦虑经历很正常——甚至有一部分焦虑对生活还有帮助。作为人类，我们发展了感受焦虑的能力，因为这是进化上的优势。假如一只水牛企图攻击我们，我们的焦虑感就会激增并且我们的身体会进入“战斗OR逃跑”模式。如果面对危险的时候依然平静，那么这么久以来我们将无法作为一种物种生存下来。焦虑也可以激励我们完成重要的任务，并且会作为一种指示让我们对生活中的某些事情引起注意。

然而，当某人的焦虑严重影响到生活的多种功能时，他们可能挣扎在焦虑障碍症中。来自生物行为学院的一组心理学专家说，“这里有三个因素——持续时间，强度，以及频率——不同于正常状态，源自于不正常的适应性焦虑，以及病态性焦虑。”不幸的是，焦虑障碍症常常被误解，而且人们常常不清楚对患有焦虑障碍症的人说些什么。以下四件事情是你不应该对患有焦虑障碍症的人说的。

1.You need to just calm down.
你只是需要冷静下来。

Telling someone with an anxiety disorder to "calm down," is akin to telling someone with allergies to "stop sneezing." Mental illnesses are not a choice. No one would choose to feel paralyzing levels of anxiety, and if the person was able to control their anxiety, they would. Telling someone to "calm down" is invalidating to the person who is struggling and insinuates that they are deciding to have their anxiety disorder. Instead, try asking the person what you can do to support them. It could be beneficial to ask the person this question when they are relaxed, rather than waiting until they are in a state of heightened anxiety.
对患有焦虑障碍症的人说“冷静一下”就相当于告诉有过敏症的人不要“打喷嚏”一样。心理问题不是一个选择题。没有人能够选择自己的焦虑程度为麻木，并且如果有人能控制他的焦虑，那他们肯定会这样做。对挣扎在焦虑障碍症中的人说“冷静下来”一点用都没有，而且这种说法暗指劝说的人已经觉得他们患有焦虑障碍症了。取而代之，你要问他们你做什么事情可以支持他们。在他们放松的时候，问这个问题会很有益，不要等他们处于高度焦虑的状态下再问他们。

2. What you're worrying about is really not a big deal.
你担心的事情真的不是什么大事。

Whatever the person is worrying about is clearly important to them. It is not up to you to determine what should constitute a "big deal" to the person. Again, this goes back to the misperception that anxiety disorders are a choice. Some people who are struggling might know rationally that their fears are unlikely to come to fruition. However, part of having an anxiety disorder is that it can be difficult to stop buying into the anxious thoughts that your mind is telling you. Kady Morrison, a writer who has an anxiety disorder, exemplified this point when she stated, "This is one of the most frustrating things about having an anxiety disorder: knowing as you're freaking out that there's no reason to be freaked out, but lacking the ability to shut the emotion down (link is external)." Rather then expressing opinions about their fears or source of anxiety, listen to their concerns in a compassionate and empathetic manner.
不管这个人担心的是什么，很明显这对他们来说是很重要的事情。什么事情应该能对他构成“重大事件”，这一点不取决于你。这又回到了对焦虑的误解上，焦虑障碍症不是一个选择题。有些挣扎在焦虑障碍症中的人，他们也许在理智上知道自己害怕的事情不可能发生。然而，部分有焦虑障碍症的人很难不去想焦虑的想法，那些焦虑的想法都是大脑告诉他的。Kady Morrison是一位患有焦虑障碍症的作家，对于这一点她是这样解释的，“患有焦虑障碍症是最让人抓狂的事情之一：知道自己吓坏了，并且是毫无理由的害怕，但又缺少平复情绪的能力。”（我们）不要表达有关的害怕或焦虑的来源，而是要以一种富有同情心的方式和感同身受的方式倾听他们的担忧。

3. I know how you feel.
我知道你的感受。

This statement is only helpful if you have a personal experience of struggling with an anxiety disorder. An anxiety disorder can completely consume a person's life and may become a daily struggle. Just because you have the experience of feeling anxious before a test, does not mean that you can understand what someone struggling with an anxiety disorder is going through. However, even though you may never fully understand what they are experiencing, you can still be a crucial source of support. Try to educate yourself on anxiety disorders so that you can learn more about what they are experiencing. It could also be helpful to tell them that you can't understand what it must be like to have an anxiety disorder, but you care about them and are here if they need support.
这种陈述只有在你也有跟焦虑障碍症斗争的经验时才会有帮助。焦虑障碍症能够完全消耗一个人的生命并且还会变成一个日常斗争。仅仅是因为在考试之前有焦虑的体验，并不意味着你能够明白某些有焦虑障碍症的人正在经历着什么。然而，即使从来没有完全理解他们正在经历着什么，你依然能够成为关键的支持资源。尝试着在焦虑障碍症这一点上教育你自己，这样你就能了解更多他们的经历了。

醉清风258297293 · 发表于 2015-11-13 21:37:43

咨询真的是门艺术，需要不断磨练！

凡尘荼靡 · 发表于 2015-11-13 23:27:39

{:soso_e179:}

赖小娥 · 发表于 2015-11-14 08:31:35

原来我用错了

499633278 · 发表于 2015-11-15 11:51:27

学习了，收获颇大。感谢分享！

yinlois · 发表于 2015-11-15 22:06:16

学习了四句不该说的对焦虑障碍的人.谢谢楼主{:soso_e163:}

carol · 发表于 2015-11-16 14:34:54

学习了，感谢分享！

司马如花 · 发表于 2015-11-17 11:42:40

满使用的呢

水松 · 发表于 2018-6-28 10:09:53

真的学习了

Fenny · 发表于 2018-7-4 09:57:00

谢谢分享

不要对患有焦虑障碍症的人说这四句话 上

不要对患有焦虑障碍症的人说这四句话上