Misconception # 1. People are either confident or insecure. 误解一：人们要么自信，要么缺乏信心。
In reality, very few people feel good (or bad) about themselves in every area of life. A child who feels confident in her social abilities, for example, might feel insecure about her athletic or musical ability.
其实，几乎没有人在生活的各个方面都感觉很好（或很坏）。比如，一个在社交能力上很自信的孩子，可能对她自己的运动能力或音乐能力没什么自信。
Misconception # 2. Praise helps people feel confident. 误解二：称赞能够帮助人们感觉到自信。
In fact, hollow praise actually diminishes a person’s self-esteem. A strong sense of self is built on feeling genuinely competent in areas that matter to the individual, whether sports, painting, academics, social popularity, or something else.
事实上，空洞的赞扬会降低一个人的自尊。强烈的自我意识是建立在真正胜任某一领域的感觉之上的，无论这个领域是运动、绘画、学术、社会知名度，还是其他某方面。
Encourage your child to appreciate her uniqueness—what comes easily, and also what’s harder for her to learn—and to understand that everyone has different strengths and weaknesses.
鼓励你的孩子欣赏她自己的独特之处——什么学起来比较容易，并且学习哪些知识对她来说比较难——除此之外，也要明白每个人都有不一样的强项和弱项。
2.Incremental learning.
渐进式学习。
Celebrate the small steps, and help your child see how those steps are required for larger achievements. Say ‘I admire how you stayed with that picture. Those flowers make me feel happy when I look at them.’ Not, ‘You’re just like me, not very good at painting,’ or, ‘You’re a terrific artist!’
庆祝微小的进步，并且帮助你的孩子看到，为了获得大的成就这些小的进步是必须的。可以这样说“我非常敬佩你画的这些画。当我看到着这幅画时，这些花让我们感到很开心。”不要说，“你就像我一样，很不擅长画画”，也不要说“你是个糟糕的艺术家。”
3.Engagement. 参与。
Help your child discover learning opportunities in his areas of interest. His confidence will build through experiencing activities he enjoys.
帮助你的孩子在他感兴趣的领域里发现学习机会。参加一些他能享受在其中的活动，将会帮助他建立自信心。
4.Availability, especially through change. 有效性，特别是通过变化（来实现）。
Be available to encourage your child as she considers her options, reviews her goals, and adjusts her efforts to adapt to changing demands and circumstances.
当她思考自己的选择时，审查自己的目标时，并且调整自己的努力以适应变化着的要求和环境时，可以通过这些机会鼓励你的孩子。
5.Growth mindset. 成长的心态。
Show your child how to face setbacks with a positive mindset, seeing difficulties as ways to learn, not as insurmountable obstacles. Help him understand that everyone experiences problems during the course of learning anything that’s worth learning, and encourage him to take pride in overcoming hurdles.
向你的孩子展示如何以积极的心态面对挫折，要把困难当作学习的途径，而不要把它看成不可逾越的障碍。帮助他明白，每一个人在学习任何东西的过程中所经历的难题，都是值得学习的，并且鼓励他，要对克服障碍感到自豪。
和孩子或青少年们一起努力加强他们的自信，这将会让他们占据有利地位，无论是在刚开学时，还是在之后的几个月里，亦或是更久的将来。