Not rewards or punishments...and not even intrinsic motivation
不是奖赏，不是惩罚……甚至也不是内在动机
Post published by Michael Mascolo Ph.D. on May 22, 2015 in Old-School Parenting for Modern-Day Families
什么促使茉莉完成数学作业？是她多对数学的喜爱吗？也许不是。
In general, we don’t first love mathematics and therefore do mathematics. It’s just the opposite: We come to love mathematics when we get good at it.
一般来讲，我们不会先爱上数学才完成数学作业。恰恰相反：当我们很擅长数学的时候我们才会爱上数学。
However, they work only in the short term – only when the parent is present.
然而，这只能起到短暂的作用——只有当父母在场的时候才会管用。
Decades of research unambiguously shows that value induction is the only mode of influencing children that has lasting benefits. Children who understand and appreciate a parent’s values are more likely to internalize them and act on them.
几十份研究清晰地显示出，价值观诱导是唯一能够给孩子带来影响的模式，并且还能够带来持续的好处。那些能够理解和欣赏父母价值观的孩子更可能将其转化在内在价值观并且付出行动。
I Act on My Theory of Who I Want to Be 我想成为什么人，我会按照这种理论付出行动。
The desire to be a football star is a kind of identification. I identify with the football star. I want to be able to identify myself as a football star.
想做一名足球明星的欲望是一种身份认同。我认同足球明星。我想将自己的身份定位成一个足球明星。
但是除了足球，生活还有很多种可能。我们应该最重视哪一种身份？在孩子身上我们应该促进哪一种身份认同？
Our most powerful motives come from our identifications. We value some way of being and work to identify ourselves that that way of being.
最有力的动力来自于我们的身份认同。我们重视做自己，以及认同自己身份的方法。
The key to cultivating motivation in children is to ask continuously: How can I help my child build a worthy theory of him or herself? What am I doing to help my child identify him or herself with a set of values?
培养孩子动力的关键是不断地问：我怎样才能帮助我的孩子建立一个她（他）自己的有价值的理论？我做什么能够帮助我的孩子根据他们自己一系列价值观定位自己？
这个词用得好